What should I do? How to face my first big fail?

I don't know how to explain what happened...
I was rejected by one of my favorite university. The reason is I don't have enough GPA grade.

I would say "hey bro that OK you can choose another one" but I know this is bullshit. I still can remember how did I deceive myself just 3 years ago when I start my high school life. The lies really work very well? Can I still shield myself? I don't know.

How to face my first big fail? I have no idea.

Maybe I am a loser. I can't receive some good offers, I can't enter a university which can teach me everything I want. I don't want to waste my parents' money, if I have to study at a fucking college, I prefer just end my life. I don't want my parents to feel disappointed. But it too late. I know not everyone can enter they favorite university, but I still can't face fail.
It too late for everything.

Why I can't do everything right? Why I work so hard but I still can't make my company success? I am not surprised I got a low GPA grade but when I review my high school life, I got nothing.

Oh God, how dare you lie to me! I already work enough but I still failed!
My company, my study, my body health are fucked up, and I am wasting my parents' money and got a reject?

I don't know I don't know I don't know
Maybe I am a loser but I believe I can do everything.


Richard Xiao

life's not out to get you.

Ottawa, ON https://alien.bz

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